I have to say-
I've been "casually" hooking up with someone since the end of April- at first I was really nervous about it, because I know how confusing things can get in those kinds of situations and I usually never go for them, but I honestly don't think I've felt more confident in a situation before. I feel good about myself. We talk basically every day, so it's not like he doesn't put in any effort. That's the most important thing to me, besides respect- it's like, why would you think I would let you have me in that sense if you don't make any effort? I have more respect for myself than I used to. I've just overall found myself much happier and more confident, especially way more than I thought I would be at the beginning of it all. Things may change and go downhill, but at least I know I can handle these kinds of situations. I know how I want to go about them. What I need.

What's setting me back is my freaking EX! It's funny, if anything I thought he would've been a person to make me feel good. He showed up at my house and poured out all these feelings about how he wanted to get back together and how he missed me, etc, then immediately just went straight for the hookup. Honestly? No. Do you think I'm that stupid? There's no respect there. Then he randomly will text me emotional things then never talk to me again. If you want an easy hookup, don't go to an ex of whom you have a history with. That's not only stupid, but it's cruel. It's pissing me off so much.. I'm so excited to go to lunch with him today just to get closure and bitch him out, quite honestly. I've been way to nice with exes in the past- always giving them the benefit of the doubt. That only works for so long. After a certain point you have to do what's good for you. You have to stick up for yourself.